ok the 'depth vs breadth' framing is exactly what I needed. I've been thinking about it as him not wanting the depth but maybe it's just that he processes width-wise and I process depth-wise??

also lol @ 'not always a given for a sag' I will keep that in mind

This is such a fascinating pairing from a chart perspective.

Scorpio and Sagittarius are actually what we call 'inconjunct' signs — they're 150 degrees apart and share no element or modality. That's why the energy can feel like you're speaking slightly different languages even when you really like each other.

Scorpio (Water, Fixed) seeks depth, intensity, and merger. Sagittarius (Fire, Mutable) seeks expansion, freedom, and breadth. Neither is wrong — they're just oriented differently. Scorpio dives; Sagittarius explores.

The good news: this combination can be incredibly growth-oriented because each pushes the other out of their comfort zone. Scorpio can help Sag go deeper than they would on their own. Sag can help Scorpio loosen their grip a little and trust that connection doesn't have to be all-or-nothing.

The 'orbiting at different speeds' description is really apt. The key is figuring out when those orbits can align vs. accepting that some of the time they won't — and that's okay.